It's been a historic visit to India by President Barack Obama and the bromance that's unfurling between the Indian prime minister and the American president is warming the cockles of our hearts.
Not only did they giggle and have chai together, but President Obama and Prime Minister Narendra Modi sat down together, to chat with India on radio and answer questions posed to them by the Indian public. It was during this session that something that's been conspicuously missing made an appearance: the feminine element.
One of the first questions that was posed to Obama was what his daughters know about India and what souvenirs he's taking back for them. Immediately after, Sarika Dewan of Pune asked Modi about his Beti Bachao Beti Padhao campaign and whether the prime minister had asked for Obama's help with this.
PTIPTI
Modi replied that India's sex ratio was a very big issue and at the root of this problem was flawed thinking that created differences between boys and girls. "Whether or not I ask for help from President Obama, his life is in itself an inspiration," said Modi. "The way he has brought up his two daughters, how proud he is of his daughters."
There's no question that Obama's unabashed adoration of his daughters is enormously heartwarming, but Obama's life is also an inspiration and education in a way that Modi neglected to mention. As the son of a single mother, a boy who was raised by a dynamic grandmother and the husband to the formidably independent Michelle, Obama has been surrounded by strong women all his life.
Whether or not it makes him love his daughters more, it does show that he's inherited the idea that women are to be respected, rather than considered the weaker sex. The way he views his daughter and the pride he feels for them is a continuation of his pride at being the son, grandson and husband to the women in his life.
We learn to make sense of society from our families. This is why boys who grow up seeing domestic abuse at home are believed to be more prone to domestic violence when they're adults. Similarly, seeing women who are educated, independent and respected at home also creates a pattern — that of considering women equals. Not just because they're wives or sisters or mothers, but because they're people and not a thing made up of family honour and a functioning uterus that needs to be protected.
The narrow-mindedness of the conservative BJP mindset has been evident in the limited presence Michelle Obama had during this trip. With Modi being estranged from his wife, there was no counterpart for the American First Lady and no one in the Indian contingent thought of involving her in public gatherings even though she's a fantastic speaker and inspirational in her own right.
There was tea and bonhomie between the men, but Michelle Obama was expected to cool her heels in the background — which just goes to show how wives (and women) are seen by Modi and his team. It didn't strike anyone to have Kamal Sakhi, a forum for the wives of BJP members of parliament, meet with her or have her talk about any of the numerous causes that she supports. Kamal Sakhi was set up last year with the intention of involving the often-neglected wives of MPs in the work their husbands do as politicians and representatives. It's hard to think of a better role model for the forum than Michelle Obama, but all the attention was upon the men's itinerary.
What's ironic about Modi saying Obama's life is inspirational is not just that it really is so, but that most of the BJP would probably gawp in horror at the idea of a single mother like Obama's and a wife as independent as Michelle.
Consequently the Indian prime minister, deferring perhaps to BJP's ingrained chauvinism, ignored those aspects and instead turned the spotlight on the comfortable and conventional: Obama being a proud father. In the process, Modi lost sight of the fact that valuing daughters begins long before a child is concieved. It begins with considering women to be more than childbearing vessels. If you don't respect women, you will not value a daughter — it's as simple as that. And therein lies the crucial contradiction that lies at the heart of the well-meaning meaning campaigns against female infanticide and promoting women's health and education.
Obama, however, didn't forget the women in his life. The phrase "Michelle and I" makes a regular appearance in his statements and during the radio broadcast, Obama mentioned he was the child of a single mother. His pride at having strong, independent women in his life is unmistakable. Is it too much to hope this mann ki baat registers with our politicians?
Not only did they giggle and have chai together, but President Obama and Prime Minister Narendra Modi sat down together, to chat with India on radio and answer questions posed to them by the Indian public. It was during this session that something that's been conspicuously missing made an appearance: the feminine element.
One of the first questions that was posed to Obama was what his daughters know about India and what souvenirs he's taking back for them. Immediately after, Sarika Dewan of Pune asked Modi about his Beti Bachao Beti Padhao campaign and whether the prime minister had asked for Obama's help with this.
PTIPTI
Modi replied that India's sex ratio was a very big issue and at the root of this problem was flawed thinking that created differences between boys and girls. "Whether or not I ask for help from President Obama, his life is in itself an inspiration," said Modi. "The way he has brought up his two daughters, how proud he is of his daughters."
There's no question that Obama's unabashed adoration of his daughters is enormously heartwarming, but Obama's life is also an inspiration and education in a way that Modi neglected to mention. As the son of a single mother, a boy who was raised by a dynamic grandmother and the husband to the formidably independent Michelle, Obama has been surrounded by strong women all his life.
Whether or not it makes him love his daughters more, it does show that he's inherited the idea that women are to be respected, rather than considered the weaker sex. The way he views his daughter and the pride he feels for them is a continuation of his pride at being the son, grandson and husband to the women in his life.
We learn to make sense of society from our families. This is why boys who grow up seeing domestic abuse at home are believed to be more prone to domestic violence when they're adults. Similarly, seeing women who are educated, independent and respected at home also creates a pattern — that of considering women equals. Not just because they're wives or sisters or mothers, but because they're people and not a thing made up of family honour and a functioning uterus that needs to be protected.
The narrow-mindedness of the conservative BJP mindset has been evident in the limited presence Michelle Obama had during this trip. With Modi being estranged from his wife, there was no counterpart for the American First Lady and no one in the Indian contingent thought of involving her in public gatherings even though she's a fantastic speaker and inspirational in her own right.
There was tea and bonhomie between the men, but Michelle Obama was expected to cool her heels in the background — which just goes to show how wives (and women) are seen by Modi and his team. It didn't strike anyone to have Kamal Sakhi, a forum for the wives of BJP members of parliament, meet with her or have her talk about any of the numerous causes that she supports. Kamal Sakhi was set up last year with the intention of involving the often-neglected wives of MPs in the work their husbands do as politicians and representatives. It's hard to think of a better role model for the forum than Michelle Obama, but all the attention was upon the men's itinerary.
What's ironic about Modi saying Obama's life is inspirational is not just that it really is so, but that most of the BJP would probably gawp in horror at the idea of a single mother like Obama's and a wife as independent as Michelle.
Consequently the Indian prime minister, deferring perhaps to BJP's ingrained chauvinism, ignored those aspects and instead turned the spotlight on the comfortable and conventional: Obama being a proud father. In the process, Modi lost sight of the fact that valuing daughters begins long before a child is concieved. It begins with considering women to be more than childbearing vessels. If you don't respect women, you will not value a daughter — it's as simple as that. And therein lies the crucial contradiction that lies at the heart of the well-meaning meaning campaigns against female infanticide and promoting women's health and education.
Obama, however, didn't forget the women in his life. The phrase "Michelle and I" makes a regular appearance in his statements and during the radio broadcast, Obama mentioned he was the child of a single mother. His pride at having strong, independent women in his life is unmistakable. Is it too much to hope this mann ki baat registers with our politicians?
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